Ask Alex!

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Do Friends actually exist in this world, or are they just using you?

 

Dear Evan Hansen,

 

They actually exist. At some point go through a period of time where it seems like the world is against you nothing is right. The friends you thought you have thought you had are fake and just want to use you for something they don’t have, or can’t have. People can be cruel. There are going to be points in your life where you may not have any friends. You may be busy with school or work or other things, and that’s okay. Friends come and go. 

Some you may have forever, it depends on the relationship you created with the person. Some people suck, it’s true. You just have to keep looking till you find that someone who will deal with you. If you think you found that person pursue that friendship, if you don’t think you found that person or people pursue that friendship. It may not work in the end, but in the end those failed attempts will help you grow as a person and a better you. It can be hard to let people go, it will be hard. 

Especially if you grew up with that person or if you had a strong connection with them, but in the end it will help you find people who you want to be around and who want to be around you. It just takes time and effort and a little bit of love from you. 

Sincerely, Me!

 

What if your best friend backstabs you, but you really love them and have a great friendship? Should you end it?

Dear, Sugar Plum Fairy

 

It completely depends on how many times they’ve backstabbed you or how bad it was. Friendship can be a powerful connection but people can weaken that connection. We all mess up. Sometimes people just need a second chance. Other times you need to leave that person, they may say they’re sorry but sorry doesn’t mean much when you use it a lot. If you have a great friendship and you really love them, I would stick it out a little bit longer to see if they keep hurting you.

 If they keep hurting you, leave them, they are toxic and will end up hurting you more. If not stay, stay and help them if they need help. Help them go into the right direction. People need a steer in the right direction sometimes. Just don’t forget to take care of yourself. 

If you’re spending more time taking care of them, than yourself. They are becoming dependent on you. They are looking for you to be happy there. You don’t want to be their happiness, you can be a part of their happiness but being all there happiness isn’t healthy for you or them. Be careful and make sure to take care of yourself before them. 

Sincerely, Alex 

 

How do I improve on my attitude?

Hey there Dalila,

Think before you speak, it can be hard to do but, when you don’t think before you speak you can hurt a lot of people and yourself. It can do a lot of damage, damage you may not be able to fix.  It can be hard, but you just need to not give up even when you want to so badly don’t give up. 

Be a little cautious, not so much to the point that you’re scared to talk to everyone you see but enough to know what you’re saying and how it may affect others. You don’t need to overthink it either. Overthinking what you say can make it worse. Just take a second to think if what you’re about to say hurts others. 

Attitudes can be hard to control especially if it runs in the family, although they aren’t exactly a bad thing. Having an attitude instead of being small and shy can help you at some point in your life. It could even save your life. Read the person you’re talking to and get a feel to who that person is. Always think about what you’re going to say before you say it, even if that person is giving you the hibi-gibi’s. It could help you from spilling something that may put you in danger. 

Sincerely, Plain White T’s 

 

How would you help someone if they are going through something, but you aren’t close to them? 

Dear, Mrs.Claus 

 

The best thing you could do is to just be there for them. You don’t need to throw yourself at them, they may think you feel pity towards them and they may back farther away from you. Be there and let them know that you’re there. That they aren’t alone. Let them know that everything will be okay. 

If they are upset don’t ask them about it, they’ll tell you if they want to, just be there next to them as a shoulder to cry on or an ear to listen. If they talk to you about what’s going on, DO NOT TELL OTHER PEOPLE WHAT THIS PERSON IS GOING THROUGH!! If they wanted other’s to know they’d tell them not just you. They trust you to go to you and talk to you, don’t break that trust and go spilling all the secrets they shared with you.

 It will take you back to square one, they won’t want to tell you anything because they can’t trust you that you’ll keep what they told you to yourself. It is the best thing to do, and if you want to tell someone ask the person who told this stuff if it’s okay, if they said yeah then go right ahead but if they say no then don’t keep it to yourself. If you’re finding it hard to keep it to yourself, write it down in a journal you keep at home or something. Don’t go telling personal stories that don’t belong to you! Be there for them. 

 

Sincerely, Other Mrs.Claus